Tag: #couplescoaching
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Sydney! I can only change myself. How is this going to change my life??
How changing your life changes everyone else around you too “I can only change me.” I hear it almost every week. Sometimes it is accompanied by a shrug, other times it is said with a sigh of relief. Sometimes, I suspect it is said as a quiet reason not to begin. “Better known as resistance,”…
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Nobody’s Marriage Begins With Divorce
Every Life Cycle Has a Beginning Leah contacted me because she was concerned about her marriage. She couldn’t easily pinpoint what had happened, but she was filled with resentment, and she didn’t like the feeling. There was no explosive argument, no affair, no single moment she could point to and say, “This is where it went…
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The Dog Days of Disappointment
What my dogs taught me about resentment I’m a dog person and have been all my life. One of the things my dogs have taught me is that they carry expectations just like we do. Grab a leash or mention a walk and my dogs will jump, wag, yip in the happy expectation that we…
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The Difference Was Never the Problem
I just had a conversation with a client that highlighted something I see often. A relationship that was once energized by differences had become contentious over those very same contrasts. The qualities that once created attraction, balance, and possibility had slowly become the source of frustration, resentment, and conflict. It left me thinking about how…
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When Your One Safe Place Evaporates
Home is that one safe place where masks come off and tensions melt away, right? It’s the Campbell soup, fresh-baked-cookie zone where you can be your complete self with reckless abandon, knowing you are loved for nothing more than being you. Or so you wish. In reality, home is where the battles take place; the…
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Ingredients For A Thunderstorm?
Two Good People, Two Different Stories — Part One You want to blame him. You have a whole list of reasons, and they are valid. Your friends and family even weigh in sometimes and they agree with you. You are both convinced of your position. Storm clouds are brewing…you can feel it. In fact, you…
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Why Have Our Fights Gotten SO Bad?
“The fight you keep having isn’t new, it just has more fuel.” The cycles of conflict you have as a couple haven’t changed exactly, but they have become more intense. The old patterns were always there. But they weren’t always like this. There’s a difference between a familiar argument and a familiar argument amplified by…
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Two People. One House. Two Completely Different Worlds.
On the invisible battle happening behind closed doors in high-achieving homes. She scanned the driveway again for the twelfth time or maybe it was the fifteenth. She’d lost track. It wasn’t that big of a deal, at least that’s what she kept telling herself. It was just an argument. Couples argue. She knew this better…