Tag: #meaningfamine
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The Invitation and the Ask
Why giving feels safe, receiving feels like debt, and how to offer your work without shame “I hate asking people for money,” she said through clenched teeth. “In fact, I hate money altogether. Why can’t we just have a society that operates without money?” This was a real conversation I had recently. She’s brilliant at…
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Maybe You’re Not Afraid Of Change
You may be afraid of becoming the person who chose it She wanted out of the relationship. It was toxic. And I don’t mean toxic in a psychobabble, join-the-“toxic marriage” club kind of way. This relationship fit the definition. Constant fighting, competing, manipulation, accusations…all of it. But she didn’t leave. For the longest time, I…
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The Spirituality of Not Knowing
On suffering, certainty, and the things I no longer need to explain There is an enormous amount of spirituality organized around the following clichés: Everything happens for a reason. Trust the universe. What’s meant for you won’t miss you. Your thoughts create your reality. There are no accidents. You chose this before you arrived. Those…
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The High Cost of Refusing to Quit
There is a word I refused to acknowledge for the first 50 years of my life. That word was “unsustainable.” I refused to acknowledge—ever—that something couldn’t continue. That something needed to end. I was resilient, tenacious, driven, ambitious and more. What I wasn’t open to was the possibility of failure. This is not something I’m writing…
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Work Self vs. Caregiver Self
The disorienting shift from professional mastery to caring for an aging parent You can run a casualty drill at the hospital, restructure a division, create a performance improvement plan, or sit across from a board and defend a number down to the decimal. You can walk into a crisis meeting and be the calmest person…
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When the Truth Becomes Too Expensive
The hidden cost of maintaining a reality that is no longer true What happens to us when the truth, the unvarnished truth, becomes socially, professionally, relationally, or psychologically too expensive to tell? Justin was out on the golf course with some friends as one of his buddies shared the latest and greatest achievement his wife…
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The Return
And why getting back to normal may be the wrong goal I took some time away this week to honor an important anniversary. And this morning, I found myself thinking about how we return to “normal.” To our sense of self and the rhythm of those around us. To our routines. After grief, illness, disappointment,…
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The Life That Survival Built
I was raised to be an overfunctioner. Rural settings, constant moves, and instability created a parentified child who grew into a hyper-empathetic, overfunctioning adult. In every relationship and every career setting, I showed up as the door prize…the unexpected dynamo who quietly won everyone over. “I just want to be a receptionist,” a partner teased me…
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The Intimacy We Forgot to Scale
You wanted to be seen. You wanted eyes on your craft, your creation, your expertise, the uniqueness of your concept. Everyone does. It’s the first hunger, the one that gets you to sketch out your idea on a napkin, share your original idea with peers, expand into public introductions/demonstrations, then proceed to launch. Many of…
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The Third Job Nobody Pays You For
You clocked out but nobody told your nervous system. The last team member has left the chat. The last patient has been seen. The final decision made. The team has gone home. By every external measure the workday is over. And then you walk through your front door into the night job that is harder…